My wife has started to get anxiety and panic attacks. I feel responsible for allowing her to do what she wants for 2 years?
Our marriage has been very individualistic for the both of us. 2-3 weekends/month she has spent either at a friend’s place or with her family. Out off laziness I accepted it. I knew something was wrong when she got a phone call from a friend or her mother and says she doesn’t have the energy to deal with it. But I let it go on. For the last year we have together planned and saved money for a backpacking trip where she gets her first panic attack. We go home and I listen to her discuss who could have potentially put the evil eye on her. She has from her mother learned that what others think off me is more important than what I think off myself. Which is exactly what her therapist told her is the problem. And I let that slide. Last year she went on 2 weekend trips with her friends and a 2 week long vacation with her family. That didn’t apparently stress her out. But 2 weeks in a 5 star resort with her husband warrants panic attacks. I feel stupid, angry with myself and her. I feel foolish for knowingly letting people I know are less intelligent and less experienced lead me astray. I am to blame for it. And now I have a wife that can’t work, can’t ride the bus and again has en excuse for not properly learning the lessons of life. All I wanted to do is travel and make memories with my wife before we had kids and all that. I am angry, I don’t know how to help and at the moment I don’t know if I am capable of it. I have ignored my own feelings in favour of hers for too long.